dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
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i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
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