I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
Randomize
