at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
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