He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
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