is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize