What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
Randomize