My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Randomize