i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
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