: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
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