i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize
