carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
Randomize
