Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize