Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
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