we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Randomize
