hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
Randomize
