Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Randomize
