Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Randomize
