I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Never underestimate the power of titties
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