So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
