so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
People with herpes should wear stickers.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize
