do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
