she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
Randomize
