I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize
