Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
Randomize
