good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
