Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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