He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
