Do you still have your period?
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
