maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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