Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
i think i have herpe
just one?
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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