I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Randomize
