Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
Houston, we have a squirter
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Randomize
