Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
The struggles of a small town man whore
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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