rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
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