i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
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