Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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