I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
