Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
Randomize
