there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
