if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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