I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
Randomize