I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
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