if i can run in heels then i can drive
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Randomize
