And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
Randomize
