I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
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