At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize
