My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Randomize
