Small penises have feelings too.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
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