Small penises have feelings too.
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize