just tell him i said nine months
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
